Letters to My Daughter

When picking a potential spouse, it is the disposition of the daughter in law (what I will refer to as the "Willingness of the Wife" or WoW) that determines her success or failure at building a relationship with her in-laws? I have recently discovered two instances in which the Willingness of the Wife (or lack thereof) to spend time with her inlaws was the cause of separation. In one case, the wife refused to bond with her mother-in-law, refused to visit even though she lived down the street. In another case, the girlfriend chose to ignore her boyfriend's family at a Thanksgiving dinner celebration, instead planting herself before AIM and chatting away her evening. These two cases raised questions of WoW as the primary cause of antagonist behavior from the wife. I think daughter in laws (naturally), and women generally, prefer to do what they want to do. If individuals make decisions based on their preferences, then why is there a double standard when it comes to the cho

It's hard to believe that I have spent so much of my last days of Ramadan in a resume/coverletter stupor. A film now covers my eyes, and I suppose my heart too. I see only PT or FT, paid or unpaid, internship, search agents, and opportunities as catch phrases to my day. I have sent out 10 applications in total over the past week, but feel I am still lagging behind on follow-ups. Looking for a part-time job is no joke, my friend. I guess I always thought it would be. I imagined I would be a youth coordinator at SAYA! after I graduated, but now I guess I am designing my own intergenerational program in New Jersey. I have a lot of homework and research to do on my project actually. I want to get in touch with some possible mentors and that, too, seems difficult with all the pending work that lies before me. The mountain of applications is subsiding, but i am going to look into other opportunities for professional growth. Internships are simply one avenue. This Ramadan has been the bes

As the title gives away the conclusion and very thesis of this blog post, I will skip the intro and jump into my bizarre narrative. I have developed this strange and unparalleled attachment to my Roomba since I resurrected it from its technological slumber of two years. I received two Roombas as wedding presents, I suppose from people who knew I hated to clean (oh how long ago that seems now!). One Roomba is sitting in box in my parents' garage and the second, a red round thing of perfect proportions and weight, lives in my home. I had thought it died after constant use during the first two months after marriage when I refused to cook or clean or do really much of anything except watch tv and leave my wedding ring sitting idly in a ring box. I was taking Arabic that first summer at Rutgers New Brunswick and between tv and eating, I let Roomba roam like its never roamed before. Suddenly, tragically really, Roomba stopped working. Two years later, two days ago in fact, September 2, 2

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"You find yourself back to the people you love." I am quoting myself from a conversation I had with my long time friend and mentor, Shreya who worked as a youth coordinator at SAYA! and now serves as program director for SNLP. The words just came to me when I IMmed her one lazy Friday afternoon, when I skipped work at the pharmacy. I have been working as a technician at my dad's pharmacy, working the Western Union computer, cashier, money order machine, along with other things I never imagined after graduation. But Alhamdullilah, I am learning a great deal about myself that I sometimes genuinely consider the possibility of full-time housewife as a job description. Of course, the homestead requires as much hardwork as outside employment--yet there is no physical supervisor at home; I am my own boss. I clean when I want; cook what I want. There are outside influences that dictate HOW I cook, and manage the home, but still, it is largely my own decision... My reflections on