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Today I found a Banana in My Bed

My room, my mind, and the rest of my world is slightly upside down. I have lost, regained, and then lost again my perspective. I am not sure what the source of the conflict is, but I have some ideas about how to solve the problem, even if I don't know what the source is, I believe I can treat the symptoms.

Today I found a banana in my bed. I am not sure how many days the banana was there. I had a banana in my purse, and the purse on my bed, and the contents of my purse somehow between my sheets. Also on the bed were folded clothes that have not made it into their proper chest of drawers. I have papers to be filed. Notebooks and papers are piled up on every available surface, including my desk.

A banana in my bed means something about my state of mind, physical and otherwise.

I am going away this weekend, so everything must be perfect before I leave. Food cooked, house vacuumed, clothes washed, bathroom decent. And of course there is packing to do; studying to finish; overdue library books to return. All I want to do is finish all my pending work. I have pending work from months ago. I can't move forward without dealing with my anxieties. I have started getting myself thoroughly checked out.

My husband is leaving next week.

I am driving, poorly, but driving nonetheless.

There was a banana in my bed today, along with all kinds of random things because I have not even bothered to clear my bed before collapsing in bed. Astagfirullah.

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