Skip to main content

Valentine's Day Reflection

I remember as a freshman dreading Valentine's Day, regarding it as a sappy, stupid holiday for sex-crazed kids with not enough homework and too much hormones. I remember looking out from my 12 story apartment on Union Square West, watching the pairs of heads walking together. I imagined men and women laughing, smiling, giggling and flirting. I thought them pathetic and stupid to waste their time on frivolous fantasies of love.

In fact, my first Valentine's Da was spent listening to a lecture from my parents, who came with food for me. I had left my cellphone in my apartment, while I was across the hall, watching The Daily Show with the guys. Two of my extended roommates that year were Presidential Scholars, (both in medical school now), the third was a Honors Psychology student. There was no funny business going on between us, in our asylum of Anti-Valentine's Day. I was happy for my actual roommates who were dressed to get laid, with their faces layered in shiny stuff and colorful crap.

That was three years ago.

Now, I am siting in sweats, with my Ireland sweatshirt, which I wear with great pride despite no clear affiliation with Ireland, and my tapered sweats. Although I may slightly resemble a man, or a soccer player (I am not sure which one), I find myself as frumpy as I always am on this day.I did not wear anything red, or festive. I did not buy myself a box of chocolates. Instead, I spent today completely devoted to brainstorming and research.

The real Valentine's Day is every day that I see Mohamed, who inspires a wealth of happiness and cleanliness in me that for the most part has been lost in college. A change in marital status allows me to know what it is like to get dolled up in anticipation, to get ready to see your most favorite person in the world, to truly care how someone perceives you. Of course, many women get dressed up to go see their girlfriends, to go on fake-dates on V-Day. This getting ready to go outside for many women is very natural (and very socialized), but for me, it comes only at specific times. I appreciate those times more because I do not do it for anyone else, and I do not bother to do it for myself (My self-esteem is independent of how or what I wear, though of course, if I am wearing a $50 hijab, I feel pretty nice).

For those of who are sitting alone, without a cat or a roommate, just remember Valentine's Day is not for another year.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Mourning loss as a philanthropy worker and mom

As a new mother, I see my daughter growing up in a world in which there is no Mohammad Ali.  I am writing as a mourning mom. By the time my daughter goes to a healthy school , and learns about Dr. King, will she also learn about Muhammad Ali? Who will she look up to as the ethical leaders of her generation? Who will she look up to, to show her how to laugh in the face of xenophobia? How to joke in the face of racism? Sure, we will watch the videos, read the books, and do our best to teach our kids what is truly important. That social emotional skills matter. That people matter. That culture matters. That faith matters. That what matters most is that we are all in this together.   Our interdependence requires us to step outside of our comfort zones and engage people who are different from us who don’t think the same way we do. Philanthropy seems more akin to academia, removed from the actual needs of people, producing and disseminating research to the people who are our...

And Today I was Called an Intellectual Whore

Today I was called a intellectual whore. I was told that all i want to do is intellectually screw people because what I like most about people are their ideas, experiences and thoughts. I have shown little regard for emotions, and sentimentality and for the UMPTH time this year, I find myself saddened by the loss of a friend. Here's his top 10 of most (im)memorable quotes: 1. "You're like Sex in the City, minus the sex." [Mindless stupidity is the implication] 2. "I am a warm person. You're not" 3. [paraphrase] I am a very sensitive person. I can't have you constantly hurting my feelings. 4. "I don't respect you" 5. "I am a generous person" 6. "We can't be friends, Sadia." 7. "You are emotionally crippled" 8. "What you need is a wall." 9. "I don't mean to hurt you." 10. "You're an intellectual whore." And the best question of today, and of the week perhaps, is when ...

Amina Wadud and Dr. Umar Faruq Abd-Allah: Gender, Quran, A reading

If you really are that ambitious, here is a 2660 word essay submitted late for your enjoyment. Gendering the Qu’ran: Analysis of Amina Wadud’s Qur’an and Women (A Draft) “How can ideas that transcend gender be expressed in gendered language?” In her Qur’an and Woman, Amina Wadud asks a hard but uniquely modern question of the timeless text of the Qur’an (xii). She contextualizes the language and ideas of the Qur’an with a model of hermeneutics that is characterized by standard notions to context, grammar, and Weltanschauung, or world view. Rather than simply extend medieval exegesis, Wadud returns to the original text of the Qur’an in order to derive the fundamentals concerning Muslim women, their roles, and responsibilities. She does this through an analysis that is critical of both the cultural context of revelation, as well as the context of classical tafsir, or interpretations of the Qur’an, given that the androcentrism of seventh-century Arabia still pervades society today. She pr...