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Ode to Parents

I love my parents. I believe my parents are the two greatest people I will ever meet in my life. Everything about them fills me with wonder: my mother for her love, sacrifice, beauty, devotion to her children and husband, her culinary skills, her character; my father, for his life stories, his courage, determination, smartness, dimples, and generosity. I feel that they are both individuals of faith that are sent by God as a Mercy to me, and my brother.

I spent Wednesday through Friday morning at my best friend Moumita's house in Astoria. Strangely, however, I spent more time talking with Moumita's Mom, who I adore as Auntie, than I did with my friend. Auntie and I have much in common, almost as much as Moumita and I have in common. We love people. We love to laugh and are often direct with our questions and criticisms. We are both friendly and easy-going. The threads of our conversations are circular. She'll ask me what I want in a husband and I'll ignore the question and ask questions about a particular wedding she'll be attending later that week until she revisits her initial question, and I answer with a versatile "Uf." She may revisit the same question many times in the course of a few days. And each time, I might respond with another question or comment that does not answer her question. Her son, who I still respect by default, said once that I was tactless. What he calls tactlessness, Auntie and I might defend as honesty or necessity, given a context.

What draws me to Auntie, ultimately, is her personality. What fascinates me about people in general is the varied life experiences, and knowledge that are manifest in people's ideas. It is the depths of the individual's insight that fascinate me. Of course, an individual's capacity to love and care are equally important. But there is much to be said about how the rational-irrational mind functions. Auntie's personality is one such that she is able to socialize with all ages, all kinds of people. Auntie and I actually sat on her couch talking until Fajr. Until Fajr! It wasn't world affairs or literature that we were discussing but it was a discussion centered around understanding another human being.

Allah allows us to know many people in our lives. Some you will meet at a party and remember only as a name on a business card or napkin. But some you are allowed to keep by the mercy of Allah (swt). With this latter group, you cherish every conversation, every encounter, whether real or virtual. You cherish every comment they make. You feel the fuzziness of affection and concern develop in your chest. You realize that Allah permits you to understand, to know, another person that has become your friend. And you are grateful.

We do not choose our parents, but Allah provides so much Mercy in providing responsible, wonderful, intelligent people to raise and love us. I think the mother is particularly significant in creating and influencing a child's character. If the state of man is one of war and chaos, I would add that the state of man is also one of imperfection and rudeness. I could cite children as an example. They are cruel, and dirty, and often dumb but they can learn to behave, to conform, to care about others, and most importantly to think.

It is the responsibility of the parent to teach children values, manners, courtesies. My parents are the reason I am a Muslim--and not because they raised me in this Muslim family, but because alhamdullilah they are the best people I have ever known, and so I want to be like them. And it only makes me more appreciative when I meet other parents, like Auntie, who can fill me with the same type of wonder and gratitude.

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