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The bubble of family

Dear Fatima Writing to you is essential because one day you will grow up and wonder what we did during your earliest years. The writing won't be perfect. More often than not it will be stream of consciousness. I write to you as you sleep, with your father's steady snoring is in the background-- making me very sleepy too! Our care ecosystem consists of many people. This post will share a little bit more about the incredible people who are part of your care team. Your dada and dadi watch you almost every other day, while also maintaining 4 businesses. Your dadi lights up whenever she sees you and so do you. She has consistently been there from the day you were born, visiting 2 times a week while also completing her job at Merck. She declined a manager opportunity so she could be with you. And what's more she has consistently denied the manager job because she has always prioritized her family. What you value is what you spend most of your time doing. Your dada (grandpa
Recent posts

Mourning loss as a philanthropy worker and mom

As a new mother, I see my daughter growing up in a world in which there is no Mohammad Ali.  I am writing as a mourning mom. By the time my daughter goes to a healthy school , and learns about Dr. King, will she also learn about Muhammad Ali? Who will she look up to as the ethical leaders of her generation? Who will she look up to, to show her how to laugh in the face of xenophobia? How to joke in the face of racism? Sure, we will watch the videos, read the books, and do our best to teach our kids what is truly important. That social emotional skills matter. That people matter. That culture matters. That faith matters. That what matters most is that we are all in this together.   Our interdependence requires us to step outside of our comfort zones and engage people who are different from us who don’t think the same way we do. Philanthropy seems more akin to academia, removed from the actual needs of people, producing and disseminating research to the people who are our obvious

Note to my daughter: Thoughts on "Fatty"

One day, I'd like to share this blog with my daughter. This is the means through which she will get to know her mother, who she was, what she did, what she cared about. I write about the things I want her to know, in case I am not there to tell her myself. I write to tell her what I feel, in case I am not there to show her. I write, to keep the realities of my lived experience alive for her, so that she will learn. I write, maybe too harshly, or plainly but it is how I strive to be a parent to my Muslim daughter. My dream is that one day, she will get to know her mother through this blog. Dear my baby girl: I worry. I worried while you were still in my belly. I worried that you might not be getting enough vitamins, or that I had started taking the fish oil supplements too late, or that I had drank one too many cups of chai. I worried when I took Amtrak to DC too many times for work, or took a plan to Florida or the Bahamas that something might happen en route (trains get derai

"Living at the Intersections" Publication

Last year I co-authored a chapter with my favorite professor from the University of Pennsylvania, Marybeth Gasman, who is the founder and director of the Center for Minority Serving Institutions . As I've begun to get more involved with higher educational institutions, I decided to look back at this publication for some insight and direction. Check out more information below and please buy a copy of the book! Living at the Intersections: Social Identities and Black Collegians  (2013) brings together 21 diverse authors from 14 different institutions, including our nation’s most prestigious public and private universities, to advance the use of intersectionality and intersectional approaches in studying Black students in higher education. Chapters cover a diversity of topics, ranging from spirituality to sexuality and masculinity, from Black students at HBCUs to those in STEM majors, and a host of issues related to race, class, gender, and other identities. Authors draw

Using Social Media for Professional Development

Are you interested in learning how you can use social media for your own professional development? I am joining forces with my friend Erin Barnes of ioby to present a free webinar to EPIP members. We will present case studies on how philanthropic and mission-based organizations are using social media to disseminate information and be better learning organizations. What can we as individuals do to be part of that kind of work? It's ironic really, that I would be sharing research and best practices on social media. My use of social media is mostly ad-hoc, but I rely on it as a tool that helps me engage with the world. I use it to stay informed of news, ideas, and resources. I rely on it to connect me the ideas and issues that other's are talking about. I use social media primarily to learn. And that's where the value is. As a disclaimer, I do not engage with social media every single day. If you are interested in learning more about the webinar, please feel free t

What to Ask When Joining a Nonprofit Board of Directors

Joining a board feels like a new beginning, like experiencing a sunrise on a drive to yoga class... at least for me, anyway. I recently joined a nonprofit working committee, and went through the process of recruitment, interviewing, and vetting. I found myself looking for something inspiring beyond my current job or role as a project manager. You've got to know what to ask, and what you're getting into before you make the jump into nonprofit board service. Many board members do not know what they are getting into when they join a board. I have seen boards in which one or more directors actually disagreed with the organization’s mission, had obvious but undeclared conflicts of interest, or knew they would not be able to attend most of the board meetings. It would be correct to blame the organization for recruiting and electing such members but don’t forget the directors accepted the nomination and agreed to serve. If you are invited to join a board, what can you do to be

Washing-away Wedding Showers

This weekend, I experienced a time warp. Both my husband and I attended functions with our high school friends, friends we have known for decades. On Saturday, we joined Andrea and Sarat in Philadelphia's Magic Gardens for a beautiful and unique nondenominational ceremony focused on love. The groom himself wore a traditional Indian shalwar suit, while the bride wore a white dress. Like the couple, the attendees wore whatever made then comfortable and happy. They have been together for a decade, since college, through multiple relocations and careers. I'm inspired by their tenacity and endurance to stay together, to continue to love each other without a sense of obligation, pretense. I've included a picture of the gorgeous couple and unique venue below. On Sunday, I went to Moumita's bridal shower near Long Island, New York. We have known each other since Stuyvesant High School. We shared stories of our youth, of our innocence and stupidity, and celebrated our so c